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Assault on America, Day 210: Democrat debate equals predictability and inadvertent hilarity

Bernie Sanders Democrat Debate
Predictability vs. unpredictability. Which is best for a politician? It’s a question each of the 2020 Democrat presidential candidates must’ve already answered in their own minds heading into Tuesday night’s “debate” in Detroit.

In a sullen and mostly dark repeat performance from their initial try at “debating” last month, the ten pasty white and enraged Democrat White House aspirants largely echoed the same themes they’ve offered for months -- namely, that President Donald Trump is the modern living equivalent of the political anti-Christ, the American economy really stinks for everyone but the filthy rich, illegal aliens are getting a raw deal from a heartless, cruel and unfeeling American government, and, as if all this weren’t bad enough, the planet is destined to explode in the near future if unfettered climate change isn’t dealt with now.

It was boring… and funny at times…but not necessarily because the contestants meant to be humorous. The theme could be summed up as thus: Race this, race that, are you a racist? Trump assured that much of the discussion would center on him by picking a social media fight with Baltimore and Rep. Elijah Cummings -- and then declared himself the least racist person in the world (before departing for a speech in Jamestown, Virginia to commemorate the 400th anniversary of the establishment of American elected legislatures).

Such statements guaranteed a hysteric response from the Democrat candidates who never required much inspiration to rip him relentlessly in the first place. It’s all stupid… how is any of this going to help govern a country? Socialism (meaning government controls and provides everything) was also very much in evidence in the Motor City.

Regardless, the Democrats’ message was loud and clear: elect one of us and we’ll save humanity. The atmosphere will stabilize; everyone will be healthy (due to Democrats’ multitude of healthcare programs); oppressed minorities will receive justice; America will be respected by the world community again (in the post-Trump era) and citizens and illegal immigrants alike will be highly educated, happy and content…forever! Just like in Venezuela and Cuba!

And Al Sharpton (who was in the audience) will be marching right along with them!

In other words, the first wave of Democrats was about as predictable as they get. Not even the infusion of a new face -- or a different network with new moderators -- helped spice things up. Montana Gov. Steve Bullock joined nine other “veterans” from June, but failed to gain any kind of separation from the already established candidates (which arguably doesn’t even include most of those taking part in Tuesday’s forum, -- especially former Maryland Rep. John “I’m the bald guy who nobody knows” Delaney, former Colorado Gov. John “pass the cannabis” Hickenlooper, Ohio Rep. Tim “I’m from the most important swing state” Ryan -- and the field’s completely detached twenty-first century hippy nutcase, author Marianne Williamson).

At center ring (stage) of this ten performer circus were 2016 Democrat runner-up Sen. Bernie Sanders and first debate “winner” Sen. Elizabeth “Pocahontas” Warren, which was interesting considering both are virtually tied for second place in the national primary polls (behind Obama VP Joe Biden). Both hail from ultra-liberal northeastern states and both are definitely competing for the same rabid wingnut segment of the Democrat primary electorate. Predictably, both pretend to know everything about the needs of the common American despite living elitist lives -- and both have a multitude of solutions to fulfill everyone’s own personal wish-list.

Both wear glasses too. Is it a “vision” thing?

Sanders and Warren share something else -- an aura of insanity. Whereas “Pocahontas” draws particular awareness for her piercing bird-of-prey-like glare, her arched eyebrows, her fiery deportment and confident know-it-all presentation, Bernie overwhelms onlookers with his bugged-out eyes, wild hand gestures and recitations of obscure facts that would give pause to anyone with general knowledge of history and the way governments work. As committed socialists (though only Sanders fully adopts the title), both place blame on corporate capitalism for the plight of the downtrodden.

In last month’s first Democrat debate Warren pretty much had the stage to herself to advance her decidedly negative opinions on the way things are in today’s America. On Tuesday night she had to share the spotlight with Sanders -- and Bernie wasn’t about to surrender any more of his mind-numbed leftist base supporters to the phony Native American. “Pocahontas” has shot up in the polls in the past month or so, with most of her backers likely coming from Sanders’ collection.

It’s often said Warren’s experience as a college lecturer comes through in her political spiel -- and it’s undeniably true. But she’s like the instructor who alternates between boring students to death and scaring them out of their skin. Warren’s so unlikeable she couldn’t possibly hope to compete against Trump even if she somehow manages to bump off Sanders, catch up to Biden and vanquish her other main leftist challenger, Kamala Harris (who will again face off with Uncle Joe in Wednesday night’s event).

Warren didn’t say anything new -- or unpredictable -- on Tuesday night. The truth is, people cringe whenever the moderators call on her because they know they’re in for a prickly secular sermon about how awful America is and how she’s “got a plan” to change everything.

To Warren’s left (on stage) was the incredibly shrinking “Beto” O’Rourke, a once-bright shining star in Democrat circles who swore he wasn’t considering running for president. “Beto” is still benefitting from polls taken months ago, otherwise he wouldn’t be so near the center of the action. The currently unemployed Texas pol did his best to breathe new life into his flailing campaign, still smarting from having been stupid-shamed in the Miami debate by Julián Castro (who obviously took offense that O’Rourke was stealing his thunder as the only “true” ethnic Hispanic in the field).

Unfortunately for “Beto” there’s nowhere to go in this batty collection of Democrats. The “young guy” energy is all in “Mayor Pete” Buttigieg’s (more on him in a minute) camp and Beto’s over-the-top cheerleading for illegal immigration and climate change has already been usurped -- by every other party hopeful. You can’t help but feel Beto’s days are numbered unless something changes. He should’ve stayed on the sidelines and maybe settled for stealing another safe House seat instead of making a donkey of himself on the national campaign trail. O’Rourke’s now been irreparably exposed as a mundane, idiotic, boring fraud. That’s bad when you’re hoping to one day be president.

To Sanders’ right (on stage at least) was Buttigieg, whose cuddly cuteness and uniqueness as the non-gray unknown gay Democrat candidate is quickly wearing off. The mayor of a medium sized city seems well versed in facts and figures and almost appears to be trying to forge a middle ground on some issues, but once you get past the surface polish you can’t help but think…why is this guy running for president? Can’t he relocate to West Hollywood, California and try to bump off DiFi someday? No one goes from the mail room directly to company CEO. Is “Mayor Pete” serious or just having a great time standing next to all the famous Dems you see on TV all the time?

To Buttigieg’s right was Sen. Amy Klobuchar, yet another semi-anonymous face in this Democrat gaggle of fame obsessed wannabes. As a senator from an upper Midwestern state you’d think Klobuchar could set herself apart by hammering issues important to Americans in the heartland, yet she seems more intent on displaying a bitchy, phony anti-Trump fighting spirit. Let’s not forget the last Minnesotan to get far in a presidential race was Walter Mondale, and he only won one state (his own) in 1984. Like most of her colleagues, Klobuchar lacks a defining expertise or clear constituency.

California kook Kamala Harris (who will again confront Biden on Wednesday night) was able to stand out in last month’s debate because she’s “of color” and could play the race card against Biden. Unfortunately for her, Klobuchar has no “card” to play. Poor Amy can’t even claim to be the next Hillary Clinton since (New York) Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand comes off as even bitchier and nastier than she does. Is anyone watching at home anxious to say, “Hey, Klobuchar’s the one! … Are you sure that’s how you pronounce her name?” Can anyone highlight a single thing she’s said -- on Tuesday night or otherwise?

Since there was practically nothing the candidates could individually do to add unpredictability to the evening, it was up to CNN’s moderators to provide a little spice and variety. The crack liberal crew of Dana Bash, Don Lemon and Jake Tapper tried their best to coax real answers from the competitors, largely failing because the Democrats were more entranced with talking about how awful Trump is than address the topics presented them. CNN did viewers the courtesy of flashing the questions at the bottom of the screen for each query, which reminded folks at home what the candidates were supposed to be talking about.

There also weren’t any “show of hands, one-word or down-the-line” questions on Tuesday night, which proved to be impossible to police in the earlier Miami forums. Politicians can’t possibly state clear positions or synopsize their thoughts into a single word. In this sense both Democrats and Republicans are the same!

Everyone knows Don Lemon hates Trump, so like with Rachel Maddow (of MSNBC), viewers got a taste of what real partisans are focusing on (hint: race). If only Republicans could receive topics from Tucker Carlson, Mark Levin, Laura Ingraham and Sean Hannity in their own candidate forums -- it would be revealing.

The debate stage was rounded out by Hickenlooper, Delaney and Bullock on the right side and Ryan and Williamson to the left extreme. None really made an impression… there simply isn’t opportunity to steal away from the more interesting/relevant center of the platform and as an onlooker, half the time you’re trying to determine why the Democrat poohbahs didn’t set more stringent criteria for inclusion in national presidential primary debates.

As would be expected Hickenlooper again tried to cram national dilemmas into his own experiences as the head guy in Colorado, which is understandable but not really germane when you’ve got several senators with significantly more media adoration talking about current happenings in the center of the universe (Washington DC). Hickenlooper’s too far away from Trump to be a real “enemy” of the president for Democrat voters. Besides, everyone in the Rocky Mountain State is either high from legalized pot or too busy getting rich from fracking to pay attention to what’s going down thousands of miles away.

I can’t speak for everyone, but other non-Democrats watching (if there were any) were probably hoping Williamson would get more questions from the moderators since she’s so far out in loony left field that it’s impossible to establish where she comes down. Marianne’s only appeal is as an outsider -- which let’s face it, Democrats don’t care about anyway -- so when you’ve got crazy Bernie and angrier-than-heck “Pocahontas” at center stage, why would anyone look to a no-name soft-talking weirdo for a big whiff of liberal gobbledygook?

Oddly enough, Williamson’s probably the only one who definitely sets herself apart from the rest -- by basically attacking all other Democrats for being part of the problem -- and she’s memorable for the crazy stuff she says and her off-putting kook manner of speaking. But hers is the type of spooky voice you’d more often hear narrating a frightening B horror movie rather than delivering an inaugural address. Send the kids to bed before her turn -- or they might have nightmares.

Give credit to Bullock for trying to take advantage of his few minutes of fame on Tuesday night. As governor of a mostly Republican state (Montana) Bullock passed himself off as a political bridge builder who works well with today’s two warring parties. But how could he possibly stand out in this evolving train wreck? He’s in this week’s debates because California wacko Rep. Eric Swalwell dropped out (hence, creating room for another contestant). Heck, Bullock doesn’t even have a billion bucks of his own money to blow like Tom Steyer (who almost certainly will show up in the next round of debates in September) does.

Lastly, Ryan and Delaney are so invisible in this race you could practically see through them like banshees on a staircase. Some people run for president just to say they’ve run for president. Enough said.

Delaney did have a couple testy exchanges with the true socialists -- Warren and Sanders -- but is there room for a “moderate” who directly criticizes socialistic policies? Hmpf.

Who “won” Tuesday night’s debate? To this observer, Donald Trump. The president wasn’t anywhere near Detroit yet came out ahead simply because he looks to be the most rational choice in next year’s election. By now Americans have gotten used to hearing “President Trump” and most have solid opinions of him (positive or negative, of course). Conservatives and Republicans weren’t at all happy about the budget Trump agreed to with Nancy Pelosi and Mitch McConnell last week -- but compared to any of these stature-less gonzo Democrats, Trump looks ultra-presidential.

Sanders came off as the angriest Democrat. This probably means Democrat voters felt he did best. We’ll see.

It’s often said these debates do little to help voters make up their minds, and it might be especially true in Democrats’ case. It’s hard to think of a time in history where one of the parties has offered such poor candidates for president as this year’s Democrats. The party’s “stars” are extreme and the no-names are boring. Sounds like a recipe for disaster, not a roadmap to victory.

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